14/ 02/ 17
Joseph’s Twenty First
Hi Joseph so you may have noticed I didn’t write on your Facebook wall for your twenty-first because first I spent the whole day with you and secondly it’s a bit mainstream right? Instead, I decided to dedicate a whole URL to your birthday! http://clairesempf.com/josephs-twenty-first 🙂
Basically, I just wanted to say that I am kind of proud of you and the person you are today… I say kind of because most times you piss me off to the max, still hoping it’s on purpose. I am so happy you had stayed around and celebrated your past 5 birthdays with me and have started getting haircuts again. I’m proud of everything that you have accomplished in your life like your little home, your apprenticeship, baring with me (it’s a full-time job right?), your online entrepreneurial success, not getting a speeding fine before reaching your opens, your ability to cook a great steak, how you have managed to keep your car running over 300,000 and still love it to bits, and so much more that I just can’t think of right now…
Also, I promise your present is coming! I hope it is here before you come home next :/ It sucks that I haven’t been able to treat you yet but trust me! Next time you’re home I’m taking you on a picnic and I’ll try not to rape you. No promises. Hi Mum! Still a virgin, yes mum. Sorry. Okay. Where is this going?
I have kind of got nothing left for ya but hopefully, I’ll still be around for the end of your twenties! Might have a dog or you could be president by then. Probably will have a pretty nice ring and a couple baby Joseph’s running around? Scary. There are still a couple things you need to tick off the list first, starting with a Tucson…
Sorry for the grammar, and punctuation. Not Sorry.